The Absolute Greatest

This is something that one of my best friends composed to send to my ex-boyfriend. And for this, she has earned her place as probably the best person on the face of this planet.

hi adam this is gabby. obvious but i'm just saying to let you know it actually IS me typing this... i want to let ou know that i do not appreciate the fact that you harass kiley all the fucking time. she does not want to hear about your life and the girls you want to date. nobody does.

stop texting kiley or i will get a restraining order

she does not want to hang out with you

she does not want you to be best friends with one of her best friends

she actually quite frankly hates you

p.s. i hate you too

love, no scratch that, with every morsel of hate that is contained within my soul, gabby